So I play soccer and I love it, but i love soccer and not all the other bullshit that comes along with it. That actual feeling of not being able to catch a breathe but still sprinting after the ball, or looking down to see the skin ripped from your knees after a goal saving tackle, slapping hands at the end of the 90 minute game with the same girl you just trashed talked. Those are the moments that I keep playing for but the pressure beyond the field sometimes get in the way of the simple game. At this level of play collegiate soccer is next, but recently i have chosen not to even try to make a team. Knowing that next high-school season will be my last pretty much freaks me out, but am I willing to give up all my summer vacations, all my weekends, spring break christmas break, and every other moment of free time to play soccer? I am not convinced it's worth it. Decision making definitely isn't a strength for me, but I am actually proud of myself that I, by myself, have decided not to play. Yes, the college coaches are alluring and yes, its a little embarrassing when my teammates ask me if I have committed yet yes, it is scary to think I will never get to feel that competitive rush of walking on the field again, yes I feel like i am disappointing my parents and coach a little, and yes occasionally i question whether or not i am even making the right decision, but as of now I think it is the right one and for once I am going to just go for it.